


Anagrams for Beginners

by ottermo



Category: Humans (TV)
Genre: Crack, F/F, Honestly this is ridiculous
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-05
Updated: 2018-12-05
Packaged: 2019-09-07 15:34:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 992
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16856650
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ottermo/pseuds/ottermo
Summary: Crack fic based on the premise that Astrid got really, really into knitting while she was in hospital.





	Anagrams for Beginners

**Author's Note:**

> I was just minding my own business on tumblr making a nonsense post and I happened to accidentally promise that I'd write this fic if anyone could figure out a certain anagram. 
> 
> Cai did because Cai is Cai so I had to subject Niska to this. 
> 
> And, by extension, you.

 

“No,” says Niska firmly, upon being presented with an emerald-green jumper with a large letter “N” picked out in white wool.

Sophie looks up at her with big eyes. “Please, Niska? It’s for a thing! I’m going to wear mine, too!”

Currently Sophie has a red-sleeved garment tied around her waist, so Niska can’t see the letter, but Sam is proudly sporting his blue “S” and grinning up at her.

“But why?” Niska asks.

“For a _thing_!” Sophie repeats insistently, but with a solemn air, as though referring to an extremely important, covert operation that can’t be spoken about openly.

Which is obviously idiotic, since it’s about wearing their initials on their clothing. It couldn’t get less covert. Or more pointless.

“If I take it, will you leave me alone?” Niska asks, reaching out a hand.

“I’ll leave you alone once you’re _wearing_ it,” Sophie promises.

Behind Sophie and Sam, Niska’s peripheral vision picks up her three brothers, strolling past in similarly gaudy jumpers. Leo’s L at least makes some kind of sense, but Fred and Max are _both_ wearing the letter ‘M’ and that’s just stupid.

“I’m not wearing it unless you tell me what it’s for,” Niska says.

“We’re not allowed,” says Sophie.

“By whom? Who is your leader?”

It’s a little amusing to be asking Sophie a question she last demanded of a sinister orange-eyes during her mystery tour, but Niska keeps her facial expression on the frustrated side of neutral, despite the urge to smile.

“We can’t tell you that either,” says Sophie, and scampers off. “Come on, Sam!”

The small synth does not immediately follow her, and instead beckons Niska to bend down closer so he can whisper.

“It’s Astrid,” says Sam confidentially, when she does stoop to listen. “So you can’t say no.”

Niska returns to her full height feeling a little offended that he is so exactly correct. She puts the jumper on and tries to remain looking dignified, even though this is the most ridiculous thing she’s ever worn. She would rather be undercover in triple-denim again.

On her way through the Hawkinses’ house she passes Mia, who is wearing an ‘A’. Niska narrows her eyes. “You’re not calling yourself ‘Anita’ again, are you? When we were talking about not hiding anymore, that is definitely not what I meant.”

Mia smiles. “It’s not for ‘Anita’. These aren’t initials.”

“But I have to wear an N and I’ve seen Karen wearing a K already…”

“Think a little deeper than that,” says Mia mysteriously.

Niska frowns and walks on. She passes two Ys, an I, and a familiar-looking synth wearing an ‘O’, whom she realises with a start used to belong to George Millican. Mattie is wearing a ‘W’ and makes no reply when Niska asks if it’s upside down. Curiously, Mattie doesn’t seem at all self-conscious to be wearing the strange garment. Niska begins to wonder if she is the only sane person in this entire house.

She steps out of the back door, following Toby, who is one of the Ys, and a human girl wearing an R. Niska mentally sorts the letters she’s seen so far, assuming that there is some kind of code being spelt out. There are three people already in the garden: two synths wearing ‘U’ and ‘R’, and of course, Astrid, sitting on a patio chair and looking very smug. Her letter is an ‘E’.

“E for enigmatic, but also _eccentric_ ,” Niska says with a certain amount of disapproval. “What is this? You all look insane.”

“We are not the only ones,” says Astrid with a twinkle in her eye.

Niska looks down at her own letter. “I am only wearing this under duress.”

Astrid grins. “Well, it won’t be for much longer. I think we are nearly ready.”

Niska looks up. By now, most of the others have followed her outside and are beginning to assemble themselves in some kind of order, only while they are chatting in groups, enough of their backs are turned that she can’t make out the sequence. Mentally she rotates a few of the people whose letters she’s already seen.

She looks down at a tug on her sleeve. Sophie is wearing her jumper properly now, and it has an ‘I’ on it.

“Come on,” the little girl says, “You’re over here, next to me.”

Niska allows herself to be dragged to one end of the line of people, and notes Fred helping Astrid out of her chair. Astrid moves slowly to the other end of the line, leaning heavily on Fred. Despite the long hospital stay, during which Astrid and Fred had apparently cultivated a curiously deep friendship, Astrid is still not quite recovered from her injury. Still, she stands proudly at the opposite end of the line, and claps her hands together to call everyone to attention.

“Thank you all for joining in with this,” she says. “You can turn around now.”

They begin to turn one by one, and Niska watches as the message reveals itself. Next to her and Sophie she can now see Sam, Karen and Mia. N, I, S, K, A. Then there’s Mattie, then a synth she doesn’t recognise, followed by Laura and Leo in matching Ls. W, I, L, L.

Then there’s Laura’s ex-bodyguard in his bright orange ‘Y’, Millican’s synth in his ‘O’, and a synth with pink hair who’s wearing a ‘U’.

Max is next to her. Then Joe with an ‘A’. The synth in the ‘R’, then Toby and his friend, making up M A R R Y.

Fred and Astrid are last, the M and the E. Astrid pulls away from Fred’s supportive arm and steps out in front of the queue of people, stretches out her hand. “Well?”

Niska closes her eyes against the mushy sentiment, but can’t help beaming when she opens them again.

"Obviously I will," she says.

She'll have to confiscate those knitting needles, though, and quickly. 

 


End file.
